I hope my sanity returns someday.
I wish it would return as soon as tomorrow and I would wake up being my old self again: a sane, nonviolent, open minded and openhearted liberal.
But today, if I had a machine gun, I would most likely open fire at a group of locals gathering on the beach under my balcony, enjoying 72 hours of a non-stop beach party with a non-stop obnoxiously loud music.
And totally ignoring my pleas, my helpless cries to turn the music down.
So today I would coldbloodedly mow them all down, men, women and children, to silence that obnoxious noise. And then I would take a nap!
I could not run away from them this weekend, not even for a spell of a silence, because on Thursday I was diagnosed with a bad case of infection and ordered to stay in bed at least till tomorrow. And I am sick like a dog...
I used to like Latin music (I doubt that after this weekend I would ever be able to), I used to like Puertoricans ( again, I am not sure that after this weekend I will ever be able to).
I used to be nonviolent - but today I would kill gladly those inconsiderate monsters on the beach.
And, I am afraid, that after 72 hours of being tortured with increadibly loud Latin music (who cares if good or bad??? 72 hours of Chopin or Bach or Vivaldi would be waaaay too much! especially at that decibel level!) if I ever hear a loud Latin music again, my instinctual reaction would be to want to murder - quickly - anyone who plays it.
Oh, boy, I used to be an open minded liberal - today I am closer to being a racist that I could ever imagine!
Of course it is not the beach goers race, not their skin color that makes me today want to coldbloodedly murder them all - it's their obnoxiousness, their total lack of consideration for people, who live in my building, as well as for people, who might want to enjoy the beach - without having been forced to listen to their choice of music at their chosen level of deafening amount of decibels.
Now I understand first hand at least some of the mechanisms behind the so called "racism" and "racial profiling" - they are likely to have nothing to do with race as such, but are perhaps only an unfortunate result of obnoxious elements of a lifestyle of a group of people, people behaving according to a different set of cultural norms (and now I am being euphemistic - liberal that I usually am).
I hope this weekend - and the beach party outside my windows - will end soon and that I might soon start regaining my sanity.